A gift for you from the Other Side (a.k.a. I can’t believe I’m doing this)

Liv with pic of Nana

Yesterday, I got a visit from my Nana. And then she brought some of your loved ones over, too. It was a day, from start to finish, of appearances and sacred signs that made my heart absolutely race. And that’s really saying something, since I’m pretty used to engaging with the Great Beyond. Let me give you the highlights because there’s a gift in it all for you.

Nana passed away nearly a year and a half ago, but when she was alive, she knew I could see and hear spirits and angels. She assured me multiple times that she’d be popping in, sending signs, and whispering in my ear (i.e. bossing me around!) once she was in Heaven. We had some good laughs – and shed a few tears – about that future reality. But after her passing, I didn’t hear much from her – up until these past few weeks (maybe you saw my Christmas tree story, for instance). It’s like she was picking up steam, gaining the energy and know-how to get through to me in a major way.

A Vivid Dream

Several days ago, I started noticing “spirit chatter” swirling around me, like the faded din of a busy restaurant. I was too busy to get still and tune in, so the spirits found another way to get my attention (they’re sneaky like that!). On Monday night, Nana came to me in a dream – so vivid and real that I was surpised the next morning when I woke up in my bed! In the dream, as I shared on social media, Nana and I were with old friends and dear family, sitting next to each other, having a marvelous time. Everyone was laughing, loving, reminiscing. And then I realized I was the only one who could see her. They weren’t talking to her…they were talking ABOUT her. I couldn’t believe they were missing her being right there!

Don’t forget – you see and hear what others can’t, Nana reminded me. And then she asked that I use that gift to let more people know their loved ones are near…they’re sitting at the restaurant with them, riding in the carpool with them, dancing in the living room with them. Oh! Mission accomplished, I told her. I’ll be teaching that soon! But she already seemed very aware of my recent decision to devote the next year of my online class, Project Light Year, to helping participants deepen their awareness of and connection to spirits and angels.

There’s more to share than you think and more people to reach, Nana said – but I didn’t quite understand. She then demonstrated some of the amazing ways she’s learned to play with time and space – and then I woke up, surprised to be in my bed since I could have sworn I’d just been in a restaurant with Nana.

A Crowded Room

Our interaction had been incredibly vivid and stayed with me into my waking hours, which is how I know Nana was really with me. But I didn’t know how to address the things she’d requested and shown me, so I set them aside and went on with my day. Until, that is, she showed up again. Not in dream form, but standing in my bedroom when I walked in. And this time, she brought a roomful of moms and dads, grandmas and grandpas, children and pets all in spirit form, to back her up. Whoa.

Nana is a social butterfly, so I’m not surprised that she’s already made countless friends over there! She asked me to please listen to them. One man who died in his 50s told me his family tends to doubt or miss the signs he leaves for them. A mother who passed in her 70s showed me “all the pretty birds” she’d like to send if only her daughter would open the window blinds. A yellow lab ran circles around a sleeping baby, proud to be watching over the new arrival. A little boy wanted his family to know – and laugh about – all the funny pranks he’s been playing on them. My heart was racing as they each chimed in about the loved ones they’d love to re-establish an connection with, in a new and wondrous way. “You can help show them we’re right here,” one man said, and my heart sank a bit.

“I don’t have a way to find them for you,” I told the roomful of spirits. “You’d have to bring them to me, nudge them to find the class.”

Nana stepped up then and said lovingly, “We have – but some people can’t afford it, Liv-er. And we need to reach them, too.” Nana always did love a bargain – almost as much as being overly kind to total strangers. So I started to negotiate with the hopeful group of strangers in my room (ha, that sounds so crazy!). I ran through the numbers in my head, worried I’d lose money or send the wrong message about the course’s value. But they didn’t care for any of my discount suggestions – or my irrational fears.

I then heard someone in the crowd say, “You have to let them choose the price.” And the room filled with shouts of support. Wait, what? Choose their own price? For a full year of inspiration and connection? That suggestion sounded totally ridiculous (this is my livelihood, after all). But that idea also sounded beautifully, inexplicably right. If you do this, word will get around to all the right folks, another spirit said. Looking at all those loved ones gathered, eager to let their people know they’re okay and still around, I got all choked up. How could I say no?

By then, it was time to pick up my oldest at school. I almost missed my turn, I was so distracted thinking about how I’d make it work! There would be lots of administrative hoops to jump through; I knew I’d need to bring Jill, Happiness Manager for my biz, up to speed. As soon as we got back home, I pulled my phone out of my coat pocket and found that it was already calling Jill. I quickly ended the call before she answered – not even sure how to describe yet what was going on and what we needed to do. But it was crystal clear that Nana & Company wanted to get the ball rolling!

A Gift from the Other Side

The truth is, on paper, this makes no sense for my business – offering a whole year of content at an undetermined price, only days before class begins. But in my heart, I know none of that matters. I can feel the vibration of this request from on-high pulsing through me. I am choosing to trust it will all balance out, that the perfect people will be called to it, that an army of angels has my back. So here we go…

The regular price and our 12-month payment plan are still available – but now you’ll find there is a Pay-What-You-Can option for the 2016 edition of Project Light Year, which kicks off next Monday (1/11). Read about the class and community, then notice if your heart feels pulled to be part of it. If it does, scroll down to the Pay-What-You Can option and change the default amount – currently $1.00 – to the price that feels doable and perfect for you. All I ask is that you come to this experience with an open mind, an open heart, a grateful spirit and deep compassion for the tribe you’re becoming part of.

heaven - pay what you can

If you already signed up to be part of Project Light Year 2016, I want to be fair to all of you dear hearts. So watch for an email in your inboxes, giving you the opportunity to request a partial refund if the class fee you paid stretched you too thin.

Whenever I quiet my fears, whenever I calm my ego, whenever I listen to divine visitors and celestial whispers, amazing things unfold. I have no doubt this will be the case again. There are things I will be sharing that I don’t even know yet. There are people I’ll be meeting who will be blessings in my life. There will be stories and connections that will fill me up with glee. 2016 will be a year of pure magic and it’s only just begun.

holy wow. what i found in my grandma’s gratitude journal

#gratitude quote - part of my post on losing my grandma, and what I found in her gratitude journal

Oh, friends. I have so much to tell you, it’s hard to know where to begin.

Maybe here: my Nana is gone.

After 40 days in residential hospice, she passed away on Saturday morning. And though I know I’ll hear from her soon enough (she promised, after all, to be in touch), I will miss so much about having her physically here. Her hugs. Her sense of wonder. Her sing-song voice. Her sense of style, even at 90. Her relationship with my kids.

I will never regret spending Nana’s last 40 days by her side (often quite literally, curled up in bed with her!). I did my best to be fully present when she was awake – taking walks, holding hands, listening to songs she loved – and Brad did wonders for the worrywart in me, frequently reminding me these were once-in-a-lifetime moments with Nana and that our little family would be fine while I devoted chunks of each day to being with her and my mom. He was right, of course.

Nana at Hotel Loretto in Santa Fe, September 2013

Nana at Hotel Loretto in Santa Fe, September 2013

As those of you who followed our journey on Instagram know, Nana’s health would take steep declines in hospice and then, to our surprise, she’d perk back up for a bit. Even at the end, after the nurses predicted she had mere hours, she stuck around several more days! Amazing resilience. In those times , I would stay overnight – not only to be there for Nana, but to give my mom support. I would tell Nana it was just like having another slumber party or girlfriend getaway. (Our last trip as a threesome had been to Santa Fe, exactly one year prior.)

The days since Nana’s passing have been crazy-busy, planning a celebration of her life and prepping for lots of family coming in. I’ve barely had a chance to let it sink in that she’s gone. But last night, as I was putting some things away at her place, I discovered buried treasure and found myself all choked up. I opened a drawer in her hutch and saw a familiar book – The Simple Abundance Journal of Gratitude. My mom had given all of us copies one Christmas, many years ago. It was an odd place to find a journal, given that Nana’s hutch holds placemats, silverware and greeting cards.

Notes from Nana about Santa Fe, Inn at the LorettoI pulled out the book and when I opened it, several sheets of paper fell out. They were all from the Hotel Loretto, our favorite place to stay in Santa Fe, and contained Nana’s handwritten notes from our first girlfriend trip there 15 years ago, for her 75th birthday. Holy wow! Among her notes:

My plane took off a little late, and I was fearful that I was going to miss Tunie and Liv (and a connecting flight), but there they were, smiling ear to ear in matching cowboy hats. What a thrill to see them there – I am so blessed! Thrilled being with my girls. 

Finding that little celebration of our bond, in her beautiful handwriting, was such a gift. Neither my mom or I recall the cowboy hats (!!!), but we will always hold dear the thrills we had as a threesome. Even the very last one, as we watched Nana head into the sunset, into the Great Beyond. We showered her with kisses on behalf of everyone who loves her here and reminders that she’d soon be seeing all the loved ones waiting for her over there.

I need time to process the loss of a great light in my life and to soak up the warm hugs and belly laughs with family flying in to celebrate her. It’s what she would want, and it’s all I have energy for right now.

the art of choosing beauty ecourseSo, work will have to wait a little longer. I am so grateful to everyone who’s accepted with such grace and understanding my need to push back Firecracker Calls, classes, newsletters and meetings. I have postponed my Art of Choosing Beauty ecourse, which was scheduled to kick off this week; it will now launch September 22nd. That class is all about finding and making magic every single day – even (or especially) when life feels hard.

It feels like divine timing, really – to choose beauty with a bunch of brave hearts this month, and to be able to incorporate private stories and powerful insights from my journey with Nana into this next round of the class (the only time I’m teaching it this year). I believe that, like finding Nana’s notes, these gifts that feel like magic – the ones that catch us off guard and connect us to what matters – appear for a reason in our lives. Nana LOVED to give thoughful gifts, and I have a feeling she has no plans to stop. As Nana always said, God works in mysterious ways – and I bet she’s got a few tricks up her sleeve, too.