A gift for you from the Other Side (a.k.a. I can’t believe I’m doing this)

Liv with pic of Nana

Yesterday, I got a visit from my Nana. And then she brought some of your loved ones over, too. It was a day, from start to finish, of appearances and sacred signs that made my heart absolutely race. And that’s really saying something, since I’m pretty used to engaging with the Great Beyond. Let me give you the highlights because there’s a gift in it all for you.

Nana passed away nearly a year and a half ago, but when she was alive, she knew I could see and hear spirits and angels. She assured me multiple times that she’d be popping in, sending signs, and whispering in my ear (i.e. bossing me around!) once she was in Heaven. We had some good laughs – and shed a few tears – about that future reality. But after her passing, I didn’t hear much from her – up until these past few weeks (maybe you saw my Christmas tree story, for instance). It’s like she was picking up steam, gaining the energy and know-how to get through to me in a major way.

A Vivid Dream

Several days ago, I started noticing “spirit chatter” swirling around me, like the faded din of a busy restaurant. I was too busy to get still and tune in, so the spirits found another way to get my attention (they’re sneaky like that!). On Monday night, Nana came to me in a dream – so vivid and real that I was surpised the next morning when I woke up in my bed! In the dream, as I shared on social media, Nana and I were with old friends and dear family, sitting next to each other, having a marvelous time. Everyone was laughing, loving, reminiscing. And then I realized I was the only one who could see her. They weren’t talking to her…they were talking ABOUT her. I couldn’t believe they were missing her being right there!

Don’t forget – you see and hear what others can’t, Nana reminded me. And then she asked that I use that gift to let more people know their loved ones are near…they’re sitting at the restaurant with them, riding in the carpool with them, dancing in the living room with them. Oh! Mission accomplished, I told her. I’ll be teaching that soon! But she already seemed very aware of my recent decision to devote the next year of my online class, Project Light Year, to helping participants deepen their awareness of and connection to spirits and angels.

There’s more to share than you think and more people to reach, Nana said – but I didn’t quite understand. She then demonstrated some of the amazing ways she’s learned to play with time and space – and then I woke up, surprised to be in my bed since I could have sworn I’d just been in a restaurant with Nana.

A Crowded Room

Our interaction had been incredibly vivid and stayed with me into my waking hours, which is how I know Nana was really with me. But I didn’t know how to address the things she’d requested and shown me, so I set them aside and went on with my day. Until, that is, she showed up again. Not in dream form, but standing in my bedroom when I walked in. And this time, she brought a roomful of moms and dads, grandmas and grandpas, children and pets all in spirit form, to back her up. Whoa.

Nana is a social butterfly, so I’m not surprised that she’s already made countless friends over there! She asked me to please listen to them. One man who died in his 50s told me his family tends to doubt or miss the signs he leaves for them. A mother who passed in her 70s showed me “all the pretty birds” she’d like to send if only her daughter would open the window blinds. A yellow lab ran circles around a sleeping baby, proud to be watching over the new arrival. A little boy wanted his family to know – and laugh about – all the funny pranks he’s been playing on them. My heart was racing as they each chimed in about the loved ones they’d love to re-establish an connection with, in a new and wondrous way. “You can help show them we’re right here,” one man said, and my heart sank a bit.

“I don’t have a way to find them for you,” I told the roomful of spirits. “You’d have to bring them to me, nudge them to find the class.”

Nana stepped up then and said lovingly, “We have – but some people can’t afford it, Liv-er. And we need to reach them, too.” Nana always did love a bargain – almost as much as being overly kind to total strangers. So I started to negotiate with the hopeful group of strangers in my room (ha, that sounds so crazy!). I ran through the numbers in my head, worried I’d lose money or send the wrong message about the course’s value. But they didn’t care for any of my discount suggestions – or my irrational fears.

I then heard someone in the crowd say, “You have to let them choose the price.” And the room filled with shouts of support. Wait, what? Choose their own price? For a full year of inspiration and connection? That suggestion sounded totally ridiculous (this is my livelihood, after all). But that idea also sounded beautifully, inexplicably right. If you do this, word will get around to all the right folks, another spirit said. Looking at all those loved ones gathered, eager to let their people know they’re okay and still around, I got all choked up. How could I say no?

By then, it was time to pick up my oldest at school. I almost missed my turn, I was so distracted thinking about how I’d make it work! There would be lots of administrative hoops to jump through; I knew I’d need to bring Jill, Happiness Manager for my biz, up to speed. As soon as we got back home, I pulled my phone out of my coat pocket and found that it was already calling Jill. I quickly ended the call before she answered – not even sure how to describe yet what was going on and what we needed to do. But it was crystal clear that Nana & Company wanted to get the ball rolling!

A Gift from the Other Side

The truth is, on paper, this makes no sense for my business – offering a whole year of content at an undetermined price, only days before class begins. But in my heart, I know none of that matters. I can feel the vibration of this request from on-high pulsing through me. I am choosing to trust it will all balance out, that the perfect people will be called to it, that an army of angels has my back. So here we go…

The regular price and our 12-month payment plan are still available – but now you’ll find there is a Pay-What-You-Can option for the 2016 edition of Project Light Year, which kicks off next Monday (1/11). Read about the class and community, then notice if your heart feels pulled to be part of it. If it does, scroll down to the Pay-What-You Can option and change the default amount – currently $1.00 – to the price that feels doable and perfect for you. All I ask is that you come to this experience with an open mind, an open heart, a grateful spirit and deep compassion for the tribe you’re becoming part of.

heaven - pay what you can

If you already signed up to be part of Project Light Year 2016, I want to be fair to all of you dear hearts. So watch for an email in your inboxes, giving you the opportunity to request a partial refund if the class fee you paid stretched you too thin.

Whenever I quiet my fears, whenever I calm my ego, whenever I listen to divine visitors and celestial whispers, amazing things unfold. I have no doubt this will be the case again. There are things I will be sharing that I don’t even know yet. There are people I’ll be meeting who will be blessings in my life. There will be stories and connections that will fill me up with glee. 2016 will be a year of pure magic and it’s only just begun.

3 Simple Steps for Finding & Maximizing My Word of the Year

Choose Your Words Wisely

Happy 2016! At the start of each new year, I love the idea of selecting one meaningful, motivating word to serve as a personal guide for the next 12 months. And I have three simple steps to do it.

STEP 1: Choose it wisely. To choose my word each year, I first imagine how I want to feel on December 31st, looking back at what I’ve experienced and achieved. What positive theme do I want to be able to see weaving through my life as I reflect on the past year? Sometimes it helps to notice the experiences and patterns I’m tired of and want to release from, and then figure out what the flip side of that would look like. Sometimes I want to build upon awesomeness that’s begun sprouting up; I want a word that reminds me to nurture and nourish that.

STEP 2: Use it wisely. And then, throughout the year, I use my word as a litmus test. In any situation, I can ask myself if it lines up with my word of the year. If it doesn’t, that’s a good indication that I’m off-track and need to recalibrate.

STEP 3: Don’t forget it. Take it from someone who’s been there, done that. It’s a bummer to reach December 31st and realize you left your word (and, likely, dreams) in the dust. Your word of the year is meant to stick with you through thick and thin. So post it somewhere you’ll see it frequently. Paste it on your vision board. Illustrate it and frame it. Write it on your bathroom mirror with a dry-erase marker. Keep it front and center to lead the way all year long.

Last year, I chose the word SERENITY and it served me well. I wanted to point my inner compass towards feeling good in all ways – physically, spiritually, mentally, emotionally, professionally, personally – with a constant foundation of peace and calm holding me steady through it all.

Right away last January, I had to put that word to good use. Our little guy, Tru, had been sick for nearly a month and only got worse while on our trip to Texas during New Year’s week. Once we returned home, we had three days straight of doctors appointments, pharmacy runs and blood tests. While juggling that with work and other commitments, I continually asked myself, “What are the choices I need to make to achieve serenity now?”

Sometimes, the answer was about expressing gratitude for the positives – a flexible schedule, good doctors, access to medicine, the ability to afford treatment. Sometimes, it meant taking a nap or talking to a friend on the phone while Tru rested. Sometimes, it meant choosing not to stress over unreturned emails or looming deadlines. And while we waited for test results (which wound up being inconclusive and he eventually got better), it meant not freaking out over what I didn’t know or obsessing about the possibilities, but just living in the present and celebrating any sign of progress with our little guy. By leaning on my word of the year, I surrendered to serenity and felt so much better for it.

This year, I’ve chosen a word that makes me smile from ear-to-ear…

glee - word of the year

Yep, this is my year to dance with GLEE! I knew I wanted to focus on cultivating joy this year, but that particular word didn’t feel quite right. I wanted something lighter, something brighter, something unique. I flipped through the thesaurus and when I saw “glee,” it jumped out at me. And then, I looked up the definition in the Merriam-Webster dictionary.

“Exultant high-spirited joy,” it said. And I felt a shiver of truth and light buzz through me. There it is, I thought! GLEE is my word of the year. My guidepost for living, my companion in decision-making, my best bud in cultivating joy.

christine kane - word of the yearSo, what word will guide you this year? If you need a little extra guidance to choose your word, there are two FREE (also a favorite word!) resources that I highly recommend and thousands of people have used: Christine Kane offers an awesome online Word of the Year Discovery Tool  and Susannah Conway offers a five-day Find Your Word email class. Both are brilliant.

Wishing you a year that lives up to your highest expectations, dear hearts!

 

Oh, Goodness! 8 Great Things You Will LOVE

Oh, Goodness! 8 Great Things You Will LOVE

It’s been a crazy-busy month, but I’ve been thinking lots about you and wanting to share a whole bunch of goodness with you – programs and products and people I’m just swooning over. So it’s time for a stream-of-consciousness braindump. If you like this little Oh, Goodness! list, let me know over on FB or share the list below. Maybe I’ll make this a regular thing around here. 🙂

courageous heARTS (they need your vote!)

Linking Angels is collecting votes this month to award $100,000 to an up-and-coming nonprofit. I’m rooting for Courageous HeARTS  – a small organization with a huge heart for helping kids heal through art. Please vote for them here (it’s free & super easy). 

My Favorite New Movie 

I am over-the-moon excited for my soul sister Lori Portka. Today, a beautiful new short film about her was released via Hailey Bartholomew’s 365 Grateful project. Every time I watch it, I cry. Seven minutes of gorgeous gratitude. You have to see it, friends. It will make you want to deeply thank every person you come across today! Watch it, share it, spread the goodwill. Here it is:

 

Little Love Notes

Speaking of Lori, you’ll also LOVE the brand new Crazy Sexy Love Notes – a deck of inspiring cards by Kris Carr that she masterfully illustrated. Pick a beautiful, encouraging card each morning; such an uplifting way to start the day!

Mermaid Pillows

I’ve been a fan of Kelly Barton’s art for years. Right now, I’m totally swooning over her brand new mermaid throw pillows. Seriously. Could these be cuter??

Flying Lessons

I truly believe every creative entrepreneur needs to experience the magic of Kelly Rae Roberts’ Flying Lessons ecourse. It was a game-changer for me years ago, and today I’m honored to be a contributor to the updated, self-paced version.

The Daily Saint

Do you know about The Daily Saint? It’s kind of like Humans of New York, but every day founder Mikaela features everyday heroes and their random acts of kindness. I find the short stories soooo uplifting and heartwarming; you can follow TDS on Facebook or Instagram so you don’t miss a post.

Empathy For Sale 

In case you haven’t heard, Emily McDowell’s new line of Empathy cards are freaking brilliant. The perfect blend of wit, wisdom and compassion for someone facing a serious illness or life challenge.

How To Inspire

Last but not least, I’m having a blast collaborating with Illuminating Souls’ Laurel Bleadon-Maffei on a brand new program called Inspiring Messengers. It’s a six-week course for those who want to make a living by sharing their light. She is so gifted, so smart. Starting June 3rd, the course includes live mentorship calls, a wide variety of resources and video tutorials – including one about creating inspiring graphics that we’ve made available online for FREE today only. Check it out here. 

Here’s hoping all kinds of goodness greets you on your path today! xoxo

the courage to shine is full of crap

"As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same." - Marianne Williamson (from a post on finding the courage to shine)

The one thing people often say to me that never ceases to surprise me is this: “You are so brave.” It takes my breath away every time they say it. I look behind me, to see if they’re talking to someone else. I laugh out loud at the absurdity of it. Because the truth is I rarely feel brave.

I feel scared just like everybody else. There are plenty of days when I have toe-curling fears about scarcity and credibility and purpose and love and keeping up with those freaking Joneses, too. It’s just that I know in my bones, and recognize it much faster than I used to, that those fears do nothing but steal my shot at living a joyful life.

When I chose NOT to drive off a bridge in 2003, as I’d fantasized about a thousand times during my journey through postpartum depression, I did not feel brave. I didn’t feel like a courageous mama soldiering on to create more light; I felt like a coward who couldn’t pull the trigger and had bills to pay, so I stuck around, focusing on surviving (but certainly not thriving).

When I left corporate life in 2007, and even threw myself an “independence day party,” I did not feel courageous. It felt like a necessity; like my soul was shriveling up and needed room to breathe, and that there was something more waiting for me – I just didn’t know what it was. Our financial advisor told me leaving would be risky, and she was totally right (we wound up in DEEP debt). But I left anyway, knees knocking, because I had experienced a whole bunch of signs from the universe that felt more wise and soul-stirring than any spreadsheet. Some people would call that irresponsible, others might call it blind faith. It was not a smooth transition, but it delivered me to joy.

When I had a second baby the next year, I was petrified. But I’d had a moment of clarity – a brief flash of faith – nine months before. I prayed, I talked to the angels and I set my intention, saying that if a calm, quiet, happy baby was available to come into our lives the following spring, I could make myself ready for that. I later wrote in my journal – like hours later – that I was already regretting that move, fearful it would actually come to fruition. And it did. I learned four weeks later that I was four weeks pregnant. I was scared shitless of repeating the traumatic birth and downward spiral of 2003. But there was no turning back – and Tru was born at the end of April; the calmest, quietest, happiest baby ever.

When I declared myself an artist in 2010, I wanted to throw up. I knew artists who would spent weeks on one painting and made thousands of dollars on each piece; I did not feel like a peer to them, but a wannabe, a faker. I remember showing my first mixed media collage, one that I was going to put up FOR SALE, to my family – my parents (art lovers) and my brother (an artist by trade) – and feeling like I couldn’t breathe. They were kind and supportive about it, and it gave me just enough faith in myself to move forward.

When my intuitive gifts began to intensify, and when healers and mediums started telling me I was one of them, I resisted it like crazy. When that didn’t work, I tried to contain it, keeping it to myself and only using it on special occasions (like quietly working with the angels on manifesting really big stuff in my life). When that didn’t work and I started blurting out things I “shouldn’t” have known or seeing dead people in my baby’s room, I told a few friends – who all looked at me like I’d just told them the sky was blue. My intuition was old news to them; they just wanted to know when I was going to tell the rest of the world. Ugh. It took years to choose faith over fear (fear of what people would think, fear that I wasn’t good enough, fear that I’d fall flat on my face) and let my intuition become my way of living (in all ways). None of it felt courageous; it all felt scary.

These stories from my past keep popping up for me, reminding me that whenever I’ve been in the middle of a scary situation – a big decision, a daring move, an uncomfortable conversation – it felt so much bigger than it really was. You have these stories, too.

This may sound silly to some of you (and gross – sorry in advance!). But a year ago, I was in knots about Tru’s inability to poop on the potty. His autism and the developmental delays that come with it made potty training a nightmare. At five years old, he was pooping in his pants or on the floor reguarly. I attended workshops, talked with his therapists, read everything I could about it and no one had a solution. And we felt like we were on a deadline; he couldn’t start kindergarten the next fall if he didn’t know how to use the bathroom. I cried about this. I felt defeated by it. I felt it draining me of my joy. Try cleaning up a big kid’s messes multiple times a day, and you might, too. Eventually, I chose to step back and see each accident as an isolated incident, easy to manage and move on – and trusting it would not go on forever.

And then one day, Brad sat with Tru in the bathroom, encouraging him to relax – as he had many times before – and something clicked. Tru pooped on the potty. Glory, glory, hallelujah!!!! This huge weight was lifted, and all of the previous tension and angst seemed, well, unnecessary. I felt a little silly for having spent so much energy worrying about it. And today, a year later, I barely remember how awful it felt; I have a cognitive memory of it, but not a visceral one. And it serves, now, as a lesson for me about facing the shit I don’t want and knowing the old adage “this too shall pass” is really true. The hard things that feel insurmountable and almost inhumane miraculously pass. We somehow move through grief, we somehow heal relationships (or let go of their hold on us), we somehow survive the big decisions we make. And looking back on them, they look a lot like courage even if we didn’t feel it at the time.

Today, I know my fear is just a bully. When I give it power, it beats me down. When I notice it nagging me, taunting me, I remind myself that there is a light in me, a faith in me, that can cut through the darkness if I let it, if I choose it. The courage to shine is not about waiting to do something until we feel brave enough; it’s about choosing to trust even when we’re scared.

If this resonates with you, consider it an invitation. This post features part of the class email that Project Light Year participants received yesterday, as we wrap up 12 amazing months together. Talk about courage! These women have made incredible changes, lifted each other up, witnessed miracles, created holy wow abundance and so much more. It’s been so good, that I’m doing it again. Registration for Project Light Year 2015 launches today with an awesome early bird sale; click here for details on the class and to get $70 off! Woohoooo!

can we connect in the next two weeks? (lots to look forward to!)

By having something to look forward to, you bring happiness into your life before the event actually takes place. - Gretchen Rubin #inspiration

You know how awesome it feels when you’ve survived a punishing round of the flu and suddenly, miraculously, you feel like a human being again? That’s how it feels to ease back into regular life, after weeks of visting Nana in hospice, juggling real life and end-of-life, and another week of crazed prep to celebrate her life with beloved family and friends. I’m relishing the normalcy of bedtime stories and play dates, carpools and clean counters. And a return to the work I love, with a rush of goodness to keep me on my toes these next couple of weeks.

I’m hoping you can be part of it in some way! Here’s what’s happening… 

Rachel Awes, Lori Portka, Liv Lane, Carissa Paige - art sale on September 20, 2014ART SALE! In what’s truly a stroke of perfect timing, I’m about to dive into a long weekend with dear artist friends Lori Portka from New York, Rachel Awes from across the river in St. Paul, and Carissa Paige from Florida. I soooo need this! And on Saturday afternoon, we’re hosting an art sale at Rachel’s awesome-blossomg house! Can you come?? All the details are here on Rachel’s web site.

Art of Choosing Beauty ecourse with Liv LaneCHOOSING BEAUTY! I had to postpone my only-time-this-year teaching of The Art of Choosing Beauty: 4 Weeks to Happiness – so the online class is now kicking off this coming Monday, September 22nd. So you still have time to sign up and join us for this powerful class and community next week! And – BIG NEWS – since I’ve had no time to promote this class and just want as many bright lights as possible to benefit from it, I’m extending the early bird pricing (a 40% savings!!) to EVERYONE. Bam! Beautiful! (Details here!)

Community Resilience InstituteTHRIVING CONFERENCE! Next Thursday and Friday (Sept 25-26), I’ll be at Cornell College in Iowa to speak and lead a half-day workshop at the Thriving Communities, Thriving Lives national conference, inspiring educators and community leaders to experience the power of igniting their innate sparks (the passions, talents and gifts that light them up from the inside out) – and helping youth do the same. Register here.

Presence Summit at Minnesota Arboretum - Oct 5, 2014PRESENCE : SUMMIT! On October 5th, I’m excited to speak at a new event in Minneapolis called Presence : Summit, designed to “open your eyes to a new level of Living!” There are only TWO DAYS left to buy tickets, and guess what?? I have a special code to get you in for $50 off. Woot! Get full details here and when you purchase your ticket (by Sept 19!), enter the code liv914 (it is case sensitive) and please come say hi!

And then, friends, comes the biggest event of all. I turn the big 4-0. I told you my calendar’s packed with gobs of goodness! Hope you can be part of it in some way. xo

cruising past the big kids: inside my life as a fly girl

Spread your wings and #fly | LivLane.com

When I was a little girl, I could fly.

I’m not talking about the times my dad would lift me in the air and twirl me above the crowd, nor about my great big imagination carrying me off to faraway places.

I’m telling you heart-to-heart, hand-to-God: I flew. I realize it sounds preposterous, impossible. I don’t understand it myself, but have such vivid memories of it that I’ve never doubted it. And that’s saying something, because I’ve doubted a lot about my lifetime of paranormal, hard-to-believe experiences.

I can still feel myself, primarily while I was four- to eight-years-old, sitting on the front step of my childhood home, frequently aware of otherworldly beings in my midst – loving protectors, ethereal guardians. They kept me company, made me feel safe and sometimes, on my favorite days, they helped me fly. Only up and down the sidewalk of our tree-lined avenue, mind you; they were very respectful of my parents’ rules – no leaving our side of the street! 

All I had to do was move my arms like I was swimming the breaststroke to pull my body forward. I could see the sidewalk three or four feet beneath me as I’d make my way up and down the block. It was the most incredible feeling; I was absolutely giddy, my whole body buzzing with glee and awe. Were they out-of-body experiences? Astral travel? Lucid dreams? I have no idea. They felt real – and they still do, all these years later.

The last time I remember it happening, I reached the end of our block and looked across the street to see a bunch of the cool neighbor boys driving their Big Wheels and bikes in circles on a driveway. One stopped cold and looked straight at me. I felt instant panic, my feet fell to the sidewalk and I ran home. I remember how heavy my body felt as I ran down the block, and how my heart ached, unsure what he saw but sensing that I’d done something wrong or abnormal – and that he might tell others. That fear kept me from flying again – literally and metaphorically.

Heart - Born to Fly on Swing hi-resI clipped my wings, so to speak; dimmed my light. I was very cautious about whom I shared my not-so-normal experiences with, growing quieter as the years passed. But I never forgot the flying.

Over the past few years, I slowly came back into my own, embracing and sharing the gifts of my intuition and connection with the Great Beyond. The past year has been particularly big on that front; I started 2013 by choosing THRIVE as my word of the year, feeling ready to bloom in new ways. But I had no idea how transparent I’d actually become about this deeper awareness.

Has it been scary? Absolutely. Has it been worth it? Without a doubt. For the first time in decades, I feel like I’m taking flight again. I have no plans to zoom down the block anytime soon (ha!), but I want to keep close the complete joy and fearlessness that felt so natural all those years ago.

So, it seems only fitting that my word of 2014 – the one that will guide me in my decisions and attitude this year – is FLY. I want to feel free, uninhibited, and filled to the brim with amazement for where I’m going, and the support I have to get me there. No more worrying about the big kids telling on me; I’ve got nothing left to hide. Ready, set, fly.

 __________________________

Want to fly with me this year? I’d love it! Here are some fun ways to stay connected in 2014…

Did you choose a word of the year for 2014? I’d love to hear it and what motivated you to choose it. Wishing you a brilliantly light-filled year, dear ones.

the secret nobody knows: finding my way back to abundance

finding my way back to abundance: the secret nobody knows

My hubby bought a new jacket and matching snow pants last week, perfect for sledding with the kids. He looks like a million bucks in them, even though they only cost $18 – at the Goodwill. Oh, how we’ve changed.

A decade ago, the only reason we had to visit a Goodwill store was to donate clothes and household items we no longer needed, in hopes they might find a second home. We never imagined one day we’d need – much less choose – to shop there.

Back then, we both had full-time jobs that paid very well; we wouldn’t have batted an eye at buying Brad’s snow pants and jacket at a high-end store…at full price (a discount would have been a victory, not a necessity). We went out a lot – for dinner, to shows, to family events. We paid loads of money for our young son to attend a full-time, top-notch daycare. We finished our basement and added a bathroom in our urban bungalow. And when that house felt “too small,” we moved to the ‘burbs – into a house with plenty of space (and a great big mortgage). We said we were blessed…but I’m not sure we really knew it.

I was pretty awesome at manifesting whatever we desired: more money, great trips, new opportunities. I trusted the universe would take care of us and frequently set my intentions on creating more material goodness in our lives. It was easy to do when things felt easy.

Eventually, I longed to leave my high-stress communications career; it was wearing me out, and I wanted more time with my son. So I envisioned all I desired – flexibility, creativity, financial stability – and trusted it would come. And it did. I left the corporate world in 2007, able to make even more money doing freelance work, writing my blog and hosting a new radio show. For more than a year, all I’d envisioned came easily, but my energy was off. I had a hard time adjusting to working from home and frequently felt worried or isolated.

This is what almost no one knows: that our precious little life caved in on us. The recession hit in 2008 and I felt it big-time. Clients pulled their projects. Radio sponsorships dried up. My income dropped by 80% and, as we lived our two-income lifestyle on one income, thinking it was temporary, our savings disappeared. In the meantime, I had a baby (oh, bliss! oh, bills!). Soon after, I needed minor surgery. And then the furnace broke. And the washer/dryer. And the air conditioner. The hits just kept on coming – hits that would have been tricky to manage even with my old income. We got by on credit cards, assuming we’d bounce back to our old normal sooner than later, and that we’d be able to pay all quickly-ballooning bills with ease. But reality set in as creditors started to call; every unrecognized number on the caller ID made me sick to my stomach. I considered going back to work, but our youngest son’s mounting special needs left us perplexed and paralyzed, unsure how and where to place him all day long; the thought of it weighed heavy on our hearts.

We borrowed money. We leaned on my parents (hardest request I’ll ever make, but they were amazing). We sold books, toys, jewelry, baby clothes. One day, I pawned a ring Brad had given me years before just so I could buy groceries. I was a ball of nerves, trying to keep up appearances while feeling like a total failure. 

Saving money turned into a part-time job: clipping coupons, finding deals, shopping at secondhand stores. And you know what? I got really good at it. Getting a cart-full of groceries for $50 or a kid’s Halloween costume for a buck was an energy high. I felt good figuring out new ways to help my family and increasingly optimistic about our ability to climb out of debt. I was reminded of the buzz that comes from feeling productive, being resourceful, trusting the universe. And I made a conscious decision to follow that high.

when you focus on the sweet stuff, the sweet stuff multiplies. via livlane.com

I started focusing more on the blessings in our life (there were still so many). Instead of feeling disgruntled when Facebook friends posted pics of their tropical trips or expensive family outings, I chose to be genuinely happy for them. I sought out learning opportunities with payment plans and scholarships, determined to figure out how to turn my creativity into revenue. I started tapping into the power of intention again, envisioning our family beautifully secure and content. I fed off every moment of inspiration, every bright spot in each day. 

My small business was gradually reborn; I leveraged my marketing expertise and keen intuition to mentor women who felt clueless about marketing or intuition. I taught classes. I sold my art. I gave speeches to whomever would have me. I made mistakes and brushed myself off. Every step felt big, every sale I made felt like a miracle (still does, quite frankly).

It’s been a bumpy ride, to be sure, but so much goodness has flowed into our lives as we’ve intentionally focused on gratitude (best fear-fighter ever), cultivated positive energy, revamped our relationship with money and created new sources of income. Now, to pay for something we need or want – whether secondhand or high-end – is so much sweeter now, having known the crippling anxiety of serious debt. I still clip my coupons and get jazzed seeing the price go down at the register. We still high-five over perfectly good snow pants found at the Goodwill. And I thank my lucky stars that Brad and I grew together through this, rather than apart.

Until now, almost no one knew this chapter of our story. But over the weekend, I got choked up while finalizing a payment plan for Project Light Year in response to many women wanting to join but needing some help to do it. I realized the powerful shift from once needing such assistance to creating it for others. As I sat there, breathing that in, I realized I should tell you I’ve been thereI get itI know the shame of it and fear in it. I realized I should tell you that even though things could always be worse, they can also get so much better. I realized that should I reveal this piece of my journey, it might provide a little light for yours.

(Note: For info on the payment plan for Project Light Year, just scroll to the bottom of the info page here. I’d love for you to join us!)

this week is going to change my life

I have yet to live a day that wasn't graced by light. LivLane.com #intothelight

My life’s about to change. So many friends have said this. So many signs have pointed to this. Every time I close my eyes, I know this to be true.

Yep, this is a week that will change my life.

Into the Light begins on Wednesday. Eighteen days of receiving and delivering messages from Spirit – a bright-light swarm of beautiful, angelic souls that first approached me in October, asking that I leverage my ability to communicate with the Other Side to help them connect with those who are ready and willing to hear their messages. Typing that out still feels a a little unbelievable to me, like I’m writing an episode of the Twilight Zone. But I know with every fiber of my being that this. is. real.

Still, I’ve been feeling a little nervous – hoping all will go smoothly, praying that everyone who’s signed up will feel blessed by the messages, thinking (too much) about my schedule each day of the series. I noticed myself getting a little worked up last night, so I decided to distract myself by watching a TV show I’d recorded earlier in the evening. I almost never watch CNN, but heard via Facebook about an Anderson Cooper special featuring people who have physically died and come back to life. I love hearing others’ accounts of the Other Side, so I grabbed the remote and hit “record.”

When I turned it on late last night, I was surprised to see that the reporter wasn’t Anderson Cooper but Randi Kaye – a blast from my past. In the mid ’90s, we were both reporting on the same news story in Florida; I was just a pup back then, in my first real radio job and on my first solo assignment trip. I was so nervous, wanting to do everything right, praying I’d get everything correctly recorded and disseminated for my network. Randi and her producers, who were working for a Dallas morning TV show, took pity on me and let me hang with them.

So, last night, it felt like a bit of sweet serendipity to see Randi on the TV special I had turned on to calm me down, having just been nervously thinking about recording and disseminating a new kind of message. Nice move, universe.

The first person Randi interviewed was Dr. Mary Neal, a surgeon who was trapped underwater with her kayak for 15-30 minutes while friends tried to rescue her, back in 1999. They finally pulled her out – bloated, blue, body broken and not breathing – until she inexplicably opened her eyes and lived to tell the story of her journey into the afterlife.

“I am my own greatest skeptic,” she told Randi. “I am quite sure that I would not believe my life story had I not personally lived each and every day of it.”

Bam! That right there was what I needed to hear. I’m not sure I’d believe my own story either, and fully trust my conversations with Spirit, had I not experienced it all for myself. That’s all I have to lean on, and that has to be enough. It amazes and humbles me that it’s enough for so many of you, too. That you feel called to be part of this journey with me, that you’re willing to trust the message and the messenger.

Into the Light: 18 Days of Divine ConnectionI can feel in my bones that Into the Light will be powerful. I’ve been in training for weeks now, in fact. Every time I close my eyes for meditation, I’m instantly transported into training sessions with my guides, angels, even my dad. They are helping me receive messages efficiently and in ways that don’t drain my physical energy.

And they’ve been showering me with positive signs. For instance, I notice 3:33 on the clock constantly these days. For years and years, “my time” has been 11:11. But lately, I’m floored how often I look up from what I’m doing and see 333 on a clock, on a gas station sign, on a license plate. It’s happened enough times that I decided to go look up what it means, according to Doreen Virtue’s Angel Numbers 101 book. Wanna know the meaning?

“You are completely surrounded, protected, loved, and guided by the benevolent ascended masters.” 

Holy wow. Somebody call CNN, ’cause this week is going to change my life. And maybe yours, too. I don’t know how, I just know it is. And that has to be enough.

Note: Please sign up by midnight central on 12/3 in order to receive all 18 messages in  your inbox and be part of our Facebook community. 

how to change what you don’t want

Tell me what you want....The Universe (and the #SpiceGirls) via livlane.com

The summer after I graduated from high school, I worked as a telemarketer selling water softeners. Actually, my job was to convince the people I called that if they didn’t get their water tested soon, they would regret it for the rest of their lives. Lovely. They would often agree to a free consultation, during which the “expert” would show them their terrifying test results…and then try to sell them a new water softener. I hated every second of that job, but it taught me lots about what I didn’t want out of life.

That experience came rushing back to me when Jonathan Fields posted this on his Facebook page yesterday:

“We spend so much time working out what we want. But there’s also so much power in knowing what we don’t.”

Jonathan’s right: that awareness is a powerful thing. Why? Because knowing what we don’t want helps us clarify what we do want.

During the three months I worked at that telemarketing firm, I was one of five women – all decades older than me – who sat in a tiny, windowless room, hunched over our little desks with phones and phone books (yes, children, we used phone books to find people’s numbers). The boss would collect our appointment sheets and count them out loud, so everyone knew who had booked the most appointments each day. I wasn’t sure why but I usually booked more than anyone. This routinely resulted in so many dirty looks and loud sighs from the other women that I intentionally started to work slower and sound less excited on the phone, hoping someone else would book more appointments and spare me their resentment. At break time, we’d go outside – gasping for fresh air, craving sunlight – and the four other women would huddle together six feet from the building to smoke. I, meanwhile, would walk the tree-lined neighborhood streets, thinking about how much my job sucked.

Though it wasn’t my intention, the list of grievances I was making in my head actually helped me see what I wanted out of life. As I walked those sidewalks day after day, I started to change those don’ts into desires. I imagined the opposite of those things I hated, envisioning a workplace where I felt valued, supported, and excited to be there.

Can you see how this might work in your own less-than-awesome situations? Here are some examples of how I was transforming what I didn’t want into seeing what I did want…

turn what you don't want into what you DO want, via livlane.com

If you’re in a situation with a lot of “don’t wants” attached to it, flip your view and imagine the opposite. Envisioning something better and believing it’s possible is your entry ramp to positive change.

 

you are not crazy. you are crazy-gifted.

you are not crazy .you are crazy-gifted. via livlane.com

It’s been two months since I revealed a poorly kept secret, fully revealing here my life-long intuitive gifts. I didn’t expect so many blessings to come from it: the sense of freedom and calm in the core of my being, the outpouring of love, the enhanced help from angels with my one-on-one sessions, a clarified direction for my work.

But the biggest surprise was how many women reached out, friends and strangers alike, to quietly…sheepishly…tell me about their own gifts. Like the one who can feel when people are seriously ill (hello, emotional empath). Like the one who has premonition dreams, including some that scare her. Like the one who can see people’s energy – light and colors swirling around them. Like the writer who feels like words are channeled through her.

So many women with amazing intuitive gifts, all scared shitless to tell anyone. 

Every single one used the same word to describe their secret abilities: crazy. “Please don’t think I’m crazy.” “I know this sounds crazy.” “Maybe I’m just going crazy.” I’ve been guilty of this in the past, attempting to guard myself from ridicule and eye rolls by being the first to declare my own insanity.

I believe so deeply that every person on the planet comes into this world with innate gifts; inner sparks we are meant to use throughout our life to serve others and bring us joy. Some people spend their whole lives trying to figure out what they are. But those lucky enough to know them and name them have a responsibility to use them and honor them.

When we call our own gifts or interests crazy, we send the message that everyone else with similar gifts or interests is crazy, too. We feed the fear and serve the stigma. I get that when your intuition is right, it feels pretty wild – amazing, surprising, exciting. Same thing if you sense you’re getting a sign or message from angels or spirit or God. There’s a rush of emotions, a deep sense of connection, maybe even a buzzing through your body. For a fleeting moment, it feels crazy-good – until you start to question it. It doesn’t take much – a little worry, a little doubt – to turn feeling crazy-good into feeling just plain crazy.

“When we understand, we are at the center of the circle and there we sit, while Yes and No chase each other around the circumference.” – Chuang-tsu

And that kind of back and forth soul wrestling will drive you crazy. But darling, the truth will set you free. And it also frees up others to receive and respect the magic and messages in their own lives. You are not crazy. You are crazy-gifted and the world needs to know.

So, what if we band together and make a pact? To stay open, to trust more, to share what we’ve got because that’s why we got it. There is power in numbers. There is power in sharing. There is power in you.