I love this quote so much I want to marry it. It’s so true: unshakable joy + serving others = real purpose. True in life…true in work…even true in blogging.

Participants in my blogging ecourse are often surprised that we go so deep, so fast – digging into discovering the true purpose of their blogs. But I really believe this is the most important piece of creating and maintaining a blog that feels rewarding and fulfilling.

Think about your favorite blogs. I’m willing to bet you can tell the writers enjoy what they do and that their posts consistently offer you a great takeaway: maybe you find yourself laughing, expanding your mind, learning of new resources or feeling inspired.  That doesn’t happen by chance; it happens on purpose.

It is seriously such an honor for me to watch my ecourse participants uncovering their true passions and purpose. With the next round of How To Build a Blog You Truly Love set to start next week {woot!!}, many graduates have been writing blog posts about the ways this course helped them change course. Each one chokes me up because I feel so grateful to be part of their journeys and to witness them shining bright. I thought it would be fun to share a handful of them here. Hope you’ll check ‘em out and show these brave bloggers some love…

Kirsten Tulsian of PurpoSoul didn’t even have a blog when she started the course, and now she’s flying across the blogosphere on a unicorn! She writes, “Not only did I learn about building a blog, but I also completely transformed into a person who knew I could do anything that I set my mind to.” AWESOME!

Naomi Wittlin of Poetic Aperture has done fantastic work on clarifying her blog’s purpose and presentation. Of the course, she says, “I can’t say enough good things about it.”

Jess Morrow of Invincible Summer recently wrote a post called Seven Reasons You Should Consider Blogging, filled with great advice for bloggers-to-be. In it, she writes that the course “truly helped me to hone in on my message and to work out so many of the nuts and bolts of blogging.” Yay!

Christina Berry of Chrissy Inspired de-cluttered and really focused on defining her passions during our course. So great! She writes, “If you want to take your blog to the next level, this course is a ‘must-do.’” {Blushing!!}

Jen Zimmerman of Unfolding Page has been blogging for a while, but lacked focus and commitment. She found both this year – hooray! She seemed to really enjoy our class, but I especially loved reading this: “The blissful bonus of the class is the connections I’ve made with so many fabulous women! I am absolutely tickled to be part of this creative community.”

Thank you so much, ladies, for the kind words and for taking this course to heart! For those who think purposeful, passion-filled blogging sounds like a blast, join us starting Monday! You’ll be part of a community of bloggers-to-be and bloggers-in-bloom signing in from eight countries {at last count!}. I can’t wait!

]]> http://blog.livlane.com/2012/05/on-purpose/feed/ 0 http://blog.livlane.com/2012/05/sweet-serendipity-signs-from-the-road/ http://blog.livlane.com/2012/05/sweet-serendipity-signs-from-the-road/#comments Tue, 15 May 2012 15:15:34 +0000 liv http://blog.livlane.com/?p=4556

Shortly after we lost my dad last fall, I felt like I was being called to California. He had planned to spend time teaching there after his so-called retirement this year. So, when I learned about two creative workshops in Berkeley with awesome-blossoms Andrea Scher and Kelly Rae Roberts, I knew it was my cue to head west.

The first two days of my California trip were primarily spent with academics that my dad worked with and loved. I stuck out like a sore thumb, I suspect. I over-shared, I cried a couple of times, and I probably didn’t even use the right fork at meals. But I cherished my time with these professors and researchers as I gather information and contribute to pushing my dad’s vision for Sparks forward. I listened to their stories about him, learned more about their work, and imagined him walking through those campus courtyards and hallways with books under his arm and pens in the pocket of his button-down shirt. I wondered whether he was aware of and okay with my interactions with these scholars, despite me stumbling all over myself.

Next, I flew up to the bay area for the second leg of my trip. On Saturday, the photography workshop with Andrea started at 10am. I just assumed the second workshop, on Sunday, started at the same time. Umm, it did not; turns out I was an hour early. So, I walked to a nearby cafe in Berkeley and began to write down some reflections in my itty bitty notebook. I sat down by the window with my chai latte and had only written about 10 words when my phone rang. It was Suzanne, a friend I’ve mentioned here before who’s a professional intuitive. I answered.

“Where are you?” she asked.

California, I told her. And she proceeded to say she just had to call because she could see me so vividly writing in a quiet place with a little notebook, by the ocean. The closer I am to the ocean, she said, the clearer I am. It’s totally true; I feel more like myself whenever I’m by the sea. I told her I had already spent some time at Santa Monica Beach, but she urged me to find a way to get back to the ocean again before leaving.

And then she said my dad was “with” her, hand over his heart. Saying I did him proud. Saying I did better than he could have {which is so like him}. Saying I brought a modern energy to the work, to the conversations, and that he couldn’t be more proud. In tears, I told Suzanne what he was talking about, that I’d just spent two days with some of his peers talking about sparks. I thanked her for reaching out at the perfect time. Had she called an hour later, I wouldn’t have been available to get that sweet message from my dad.

I walked back to Teahouse Studio, hoping my face wasn’t too blotchy from crying. The place looked magical; I found my seat and saw this beautiful message awaiting me:

It took my breath away. It was such a sweet gesture to lovingly call out my own spark – and extra-meaningful after my experience at the coffee shop. After our workshop, I asked if anyone knew how I could get to the ocean before flying out the next day. Someone suggested a nearby bay, but Andrea stopped them.

“No, you want the real shit, right? Like the ocean ocean.”

EXACTLY! She pointed me to Cliff House in San Francisco – a restaurant perched over Ocean Beach. It wouldn’t be easy to get to and I’d have luggage with me, so she said, “Let’s just manifest a really kind person there who will take care of your bags.” The girl speaks my language. I immediately envisioned it being a total breeze – and I could sense her doing the same for me.

The next morning, rather than navigate the subway and train systems with my suitcase, I splurged and took a cab. I had no idea the ride would be so long, but I was lucky to have a fantastic driver named Ricky. We talked about his background, his dream of becoming a police officer, his love of helping people – essentially, we talked about his spark. He absolutely lit up when I offered suggestions for furthering his dreams.

When we finally arrived at Cliff House, he offered to pick me up later and take me to the airport. I wouldn’t have to worry about calling another taxi. And you guys? He kept my bags while I ate lunch and took pictures along the beach. It was the perfect ending to my trip; another sign from the road that I am always right where I belong.

The other night, a man told me he loves killing people and wishes he was back in Vietnam. He was sitting on a bench in downtown Oakland. Probably homeless. Definitely disturbed. I was already anxious, walking back to my hotel from the subway after a day-long photography workshop in Berkeley {more on that later!}.

The day had been lovely, but I had nothing planned for the evening ahead. The more I thought about it, the more it scared me. I’m not used to being away for so long from my boys. I’m not used to being alone, fending for myself in a strange city, or even just eating dinner alone. I’m not used to walking past people who are sleeping on the sidewalk or holding their hands out with hope for spare change. My heart ached. My mind raced. My stomach turned. With every block I walked, I felt more anxious. Even though I knew my route, I felt totally lost. And, as you might imagine, having someone declare his love for killing people didn’t help matters.

I know my place in the world when I’m in my own corner of the world. And if I’m traveling, I always do so with a label and purpose: as a mom, a blogger, a speaker, a consultant – always with places to be and people to meet. Walking down Broadway in the middle of Oakland, with nowhere to be and no one to meet, my throat tightened and my eyes started to sting with tears. Who am I in this place, I wondered? Who am I, really, in any place? I started to make a list in my head, answering the question as I walked:

I am still strong here.

I am still brave here.

I am still a mom and a wife and a daughter and a friend here.

I am still compassionate here.

I am still creative here.

I am still intuitive here.

I still matter here and everywhere.

I reached my hotel, feeling my spirit rising. As I turned the corner, I noticed this wall covered in street art with these words: Remember Who You Are. It was like a neon message from the universe, validating all that I’d just honored about the core of who I am. Turns out I did have somewhere to go and someone to meet during that long and anxious walk. I’d been coming home to me.

{Pssst! Quick reminder that the How To Build a Blog You Truly Love eCourse kicks off a week from today – May 21st. Join bloggers and bloggers-to-be around the world – we’re going to have such fun!}

]]> http://blog.livlane.com/2012/05/remember-who-you-are/feed/ 17 http://blog.livlane.com/2012/05/a-waking-dream-the-little-bliss-list/ http://blog.livlane.com/2012/05/a-waking-dream-the-little-bliss-list/#comments Fri, 11 May 2012 16:03:40 +0000 liv http://blog.livlane.com/?p=4531

Every Friday, the Little Bliss List provides a chance for us to celebrate the little things that brought us hope and happiness this week. I do believe when we focus on the sweet stuff of life, the sweet stuff multiplies. And by sharing those small gifts in our lives, we help others notice the gifts in theirs. 

So…this is the view from my bed this morning. Like waking up in a dream! I’m in California for work and play. Last night, I stayed with family friends in their gorgeous guest house; it’s like being in a big top circus tent designed by Pottery Barn. Swoon. I adore gorgeous interior design, so this is my bliss today.

More bliss: I met some lovely people, had lunch on a cool college campus, navigated the LA freeways by myself {thank god for GPS}, and spent a couple hours walking through the gorgeous Huntington Library & Gardens with my friend Jeff {a buddy since first grade}. More pics to come.

I’ve got another busy day ahead, so my list’s a bit brief this week – but I want to know where you found and felt bliss this week, too! Share your own little bliss list in the comment section or via your own blog – and please visit others who post their bliss here {just click on their photos below}! You can participate in the link party below through Sunday at midnight central.

{Wanna share some badge bling? Click here to get yours!} 

I recently turned down two big opportunities. One kinda high-profile, one probably quite lucrative. Some folks would probably consider my walking away to be downright craaaazy, but I gotta tell you: it felt soooo good. Yes, I could have done either job, but neither one would have made me happy in the long-term or aligned with the work I’m most passionate about {including this blog}.

I knew pretty darn quick that neither opportunity was a good fit for me. I wasn’t jumping out of my skin with glee. My heart wasn’t doing cartwheels. I didn’t call Brad with an “oh-my-god-you’ll-never-believe-this” moment. The deafening silence within me was my cue to think twice.

It took years to reach this point. It used to be that every time an opportunity crossed my path, I said yes. I didn’t have the heart to say no to people {part of my deeply-rooted talent for people-pleasing!}. Whenever someone asked me to do something within my skill set, I would jump on board. I would do a good job. And, then, instead of feeling fulfilled or purposeful afterwards, I would often feel drained and deflated.

FINALLY, I realized doing stuff I was good at was not the same as doing work I was passionate about. We are all so lucky to be born and raised with many abilities – but we’re blessed with particular gifts and interests that, when given priority, can lead us to our purpose. Now that, my friends, deserves a hearty hell-YES!

{P.S. Last week, I talked with Sabrina Ali about the power of saying no and how to say yes to bliss. Honored to be part of her Claim Your Bliss interview series - check it out}

I spent part of last week in rural Tennessee and felt like a foreigner, out of my element but totally fascinated by my surroundings. Everything seemed different – the fragrant air, the gorgeous foliage, the wide open space, the casual pace. The middle of nowhere is something special.

We met a woman who has lived in this little town for over 20 years; she drove through on a trip and knew she had to stay. “It was like I fell out of the world and into this place,” she said. Wow. I LOVED the way she put that. But, even more, I love that she paid attention to that feeling and actually altered her life to stay in that place.

Have you ever had such an undeniable knowing? That sense that the whole world has fallen away and you’re right where you’re meant to be? Maybe you’ve gleefully been in the zone of a creative project. Maybe time seemingly stopped as you connected with a new person. Or maybe you discovered a new place that made you want to stay…or at least stay a while. Deep down, we all want to fall out of the world and fall into the right NOW.

May you find yourself truly present this week…with plenty of opportunities to stay awhile.

Every Friday, the Little Bliss List provides a chance for us to celebrate the little things that brought us hope and happiness this week. I do believe when we focus on the sweet stuff of life, the sweet stuff multiplies. And by sharing those small gifts in our lives, we help others notice the gifts in theirs. 

I’m on the road, but wanted to pop in with handful of quick highlights from the past week in hopes they inspire you to find and share your own…

1) My kids were so happy to celebrate milestones in their lives; Tru loved everything about turning four and Ryder took first place in his class’s half-mile run for the fourth year in  a row!

2) I love exploring an area where I’ve never been – and I’ve spent the past couple of days in rural Tennessee, a fragrant land full of goodness blooming. Those fresh strawberries are in a patch next to the inn where I’ve been staying, right along with the rose bush where this beauty blooms.

3) I spoke to a room full of women from The Magic Wand Collective. Such a joy to connect with soulful entrepreneurs, all putting their own kind of magic into the world.

4) I laughed a lot this week – big, belly laughs with strangers and friends. I can still feel all that joy reverberating in my bones. It sticks with you, you know?

I can’t remember what we did for my dad’s birthday last year. Where did we eat? What did we give him? Birthdays are a big deal in our family and I can’t stand that I can’t recall how we celebrated his life that day.

Meanwhile, this birthday – the first without him physically here – will be hard to forget. Today would have been his 66th birthday – exactly seven months after we lost him. Back in October, Ryder asked if we could please still celebrate Papa’s birthday in May. So, today there will be cupcakes and the boys will blow out Papa’s candles. Today, we’ll plant new ferns in my dad’s fern garden. Today, we’ll cry.

And then I’ll board a plane because today I get to give and receive an amazing gift: the chance to carry on my dad’s legacy. For 26 years, he ran Search Institute and lived his passion, paving the way for parents, educators and communities to help kids thrive by focusing on what they’re doing right, vs. what they’re doing wrong. In the last few years of his life, he was  particularly passionate about a concept he called Sparks - the notion that we all come into this world innate gifts and passions. Search Institute’s extensive research shows that when kids are encouraged to define their own sparks and receive support and encouragement from adults in their lives, they flourish in the most wonderful ways and use their sparks to light up their corner of world.

Everyone has a spark. Not everyone knows what it is – yet. I get giddy thinking about the potential here. Imagine what the world could be like and how our collective happiness would soar if we all knew and nurtured our own sparks! To have research and a road map makes it not just a pipe dream, but a true possibility. My dad was giddy about this, too – and we had such fun brainstorming about the future of Sparks and how we could work together to create a quiet revolution. We even dreamed up the office space we’d share; he was set to “retire” this year and this was one of the dreams he’d make a reality.

Late last September, weary from cancer treatments but excited about the future, my dad pulled me aside at a family gathering to tell me he’d had some discussions and mapped out some ideas to have me start working more formally on Sparks-related initiatives. It was a great moment; the wheels were turning, sparks were flying.

It was not to be. At least not in the way we imagined. Unbelievably, I found myself days later, sitting by his bedside and choking back tears, telling him that no matter what happened, I was excited about carrying on his work – but with one caveat: “You still have to work with me,” I told him. “I have to know you’re standing right behind me.” He nodded.

The fact that my first Sparks project starts today – leaving on a jet plane on his birthday – confirms for me that he is here, still doing his thing and making sparks fly. I am so honored to be collaborating with Search Institute, with colleagues he adored, keeping his light alive. Happy birthday, Dad. A happy birthday, indeed.

{Note: for more information on Sparks, go here}

I adore a good love story. Tales of unlikely reunions, rekindled romances, couples’ triumphs over tragedy – they all make me clutch my heart and feel grateful for real-life evidence that love conquers all.

To my total surprise, I think my favorite new love story is now unfolding right before my eyes. My Nana has spent the last 24 years alone, ever since her beloved life partner – my grandpa, George Munson – died of cancer in 1988. Their love story was a beauty; it was love at first sight and they married in Chicago just before he was deployed overseas in World War II, ensuring they were legally and lovingly bound no matter what happened. Nana took comfort in knowing her sweetheart was surrounded by good guys in the service; his best buddy was a guy from Connecticut he called Hibb. He was funny and kind – just like my grandpa. Their bond was so strong that Hibb still tears up when he recalls their friendship.

Nana met Hibb twice in the 1940s. After the war was over, she would send Christmas cards each year to Hibb and his wife, Shirley. And once, 26 years ago, she and my grandpa met them for dinner in Connecticut during a road trip to see family.

Fast forward to this past Christmas. When Nana didn’t receive a greeting card from Hibb and Shirley, she decided to call and catch up. Hibb answered – and broke the news that Shirley had passed away that spring. Nana and Hibb talked for a while, sharing old stories and common bonds. Soon, they were talking every day…and every night. He sent letters and flowers and a homemade pie. Nana downplayed their relationship with us, her family, but we could tell something sweet and special was developing. And then, Hibb – now 90 years old – decided to get on a plane to visit Nana.

A photo Nana brought to the game - of Hibb {left} and my grandpa {right} in 1944.

Honestly, we weren’t sure what to expect – or how this would go. But a few days into his visit, they each seem so delighted to be in the other’s company. On Sunday, Brad and I took Nana and Hibb to a Twins baseball game, hoping to give them an extra-special experience they could share and reminisce about later. Well, they were as giddy as schoolkids – walking arm-in-arm or hand-in-hand, giggling and reminiscing about their baseball idols {like Lou Gehrig and Joe DiMaggio}, looking like the epitome of young love.

I was shocked when Hibb revealed he hadn’t been to a professional game since about 1947! He was awe-struck by the ballpark and by the company he was with, saying he couldn’t remember the last time he’d had so much fun. Nana couldn’t stop thanking us, overjoyed by the outing. I’m not really sure who felt more joy that day – Nana and Hibb for being there together, or me and Brad for getting to watch them in such a state of bliss.

And the day would not have been complete without a bit of serendipity to knock us off our feet. Midway through the game, a security guy appeared and stood by the rail near us. Though I hadn’t looked at anyone else’s name tag, I was immediately drawn to his – and no wonder:

it said George M! 

Soon after, Nana and Hibb got up for a bathroom break. George M. followed them up the stairs and held the door open for them. He stayed for a few more minutes, then disappeared. It felt like a playful Godwink delivered by my grandpa, seemingly blessing the beauty of this sweet relationship blooming between his wife and best buddy – at ages 88 and 90. As Nana keeps saying, “God works in mysterious ways.”

I’m sharing this story as I participate in the Plant A Kiss blog hop, organized by Sherry of Simply Celebrate to celebrate the launch of Amy Rosenthal’s new book, Plant A Kiss. Sixteen bloggers were asked to do something special on Sunday that would plant joy in our corners of the world – and then blog about it today. As you read our stories of love and joy, you can enter to win fabulous prizes by commenting on each blog you visit. View links to all the blogs here; I hope each story inspires you to cultivate joy in your life and to believe in the power of love – at any age.

When I started my blog in 2006, I had a clear mission: take a picture of something beautiful every day for a year and write about it. Overall, it was a great year. Blogging stretched me in ways I hadn’t expected. It forced me to pay much closer attention to the good stuff in my midst. But, after a while, it also left me feeling like a failure.

From the beginning, my blogging was very structured: I only allowed myself to post a picture I had taken that day and, for some reason, I thought my posts needed to read like poems. Because I had quick success with that formula, I worried that doing anything differently might annoy my audience and lessen my blog’s likability. Those stringent rules I’d set out for myself kept me on track, but by the 365th day, I was worn out. My blog had begun to feel like a chore.

For a while, I stuck with the same formula – taking a picture of something beautiful and waxing poetic about it. But because it felt forced, it wasn’t fulfilling. My blog posts became more sporadic and my readership suffered. I’d go for weeks without someone leaving a comment. I came so close to quitting a handful of times! But I didn’t. I made lots of mistakes, but I slowly found my way back to blogging with joy and began to reap the rewards {emotionally, spiritually, financially}.

And that’s why I created my eCourse, How To Build a Blog You Truly Love, which I’m excited to be relaunching today! Truth is, most bloggers do quit. Only 4% of the blogs created since 2002 are still updated weekly, according to research by Technorati. Wow!

It makes me sad to think of all the valuable voices that have gone silent. At the same time, I’m not surprised that so many bloggers have thrown in the towel – because so many blogs are created for all the wrong reasons. As I say in my course materials, the blogs that are booming & blooming these days are those created from the HEART – with palpable passion, a clear purpose, an authentic and unique voice, a commitment to quality content and plenty of room for growth. Those are the things that keep a blogger motivated and keeps readers coming back for more.

That is what I want for each of you who already blog or who are thinking about taking that leap! There are ways to be authentic without always airing your dirty laundry. There are ways to promote your blog that feel good and don’t suck all of your time. There are ways to earn income without selling your soul. And there are ways to leverage your blog that have a profound impact on your business, if that’s your goal.

I had not planned to offer this course until later this year, BUT the universe decided to throw me some curve balls and play with my schedule. So, my newer course – Buzz Worthy – will launch in late summer, and now I’m thrilled to get to offer my blogging course SOONER than I’d expected! I’ve had so many of you email to ask when the next one would be….and it’s here! So, NOW is your time to shine online. 

And guess what? I’m offering an Early Bird Discount this week only – save $20 through May 5th. So, climb on board and spread the word if you feel inclined. I’d love it! I can’t wait to work with a new group of bloggers-in-bloom and bloggers-to-be!