{me and my love, 2010}
Well, here we go again. Another much-adored, highly-admired Hollywood couple bites the dust. As soon as Heidi Klum and Seal announced their separation last weekend, Facebook and Twitter blew up with exclamations of disappointment, sadness and utter dismay.
“If Heidi Klum and Seal can’t make it,” one friend posted on Facebook, “then what hope do the rest of us have?”
I think she was being sarcastic, but I’m not totally sure. Though it feels foolish to admit, every time a famous couple announces they’re splitting, our own hopes and dreams do get shaken up a bit. The stories of Hollywood’s most romantic couples have become our grown-up fairy tales.
Yes, we’re all old enough to realize Prince Charming isn’t coming with the glass slipper. But tabloid covers and red carpet interviews make modern day fairy tales seem possible in real life: fancy cars and castles, luxury vacations, a gaggle of cute kids, perfect teeth, tiny waists and lasting, heart-thumping romance. As we wash the dishes, change dirty diapers and Swiffer the floors with Entertainment Tonight trumpeting those tales in the background, that life seems almost attainable. After all, those pretty people in their ball gowns and bling are real people, too. Right?
It’s no wonder we feel so stunned and unsettled when another perfect Hollywood romance crumbles. Often without warning, our image of their perfect life is swiftly replaced by rumors of fights and infidelities. Another fairy tale ends badly, another love story fades to black. And we’re left to wonder: if lasting love isn’t possible for two people who could afford any therapist, any nanny, any fantasy getaway – how are we regular folks supposed to make it work?
Perhaps we’re looking for love in all the wrong places.
Love’s true heroes are rarely dressed to the nines or buying mansions in the Hollywood Hills. They don’t rely on bling and spotlights and music videos to proclaim their love. They’re couples whose love and respect for one another have stood the test of time, through highs and lows.
I’m thinking fondly today of one sweet and beautiful couple I know – so frail and fragile that their family has just moved them into a nursing home together. She has Alzheimer’s, he has chronic pain; but they remain so in love and so deeply connected that it’s unimaginable to separate them for even a day. That’s the kind of couple who deserves to be on the covers of magazines, engraved in our hearts as an example of true and lasting love. I bet Heidi and Seal are wishing on stars that they could find that kind of love, too.
Perfectly timed. I was just commenting to my husband about this exact separation and he sweetly reminded me of his sweet neighbors. They have found life long love and are still going strong in their marriage after many years. If we can model ourselves after them we’ll have it all. That’s who we need to be looking to. Not jet-setting celebs.
Ah. Hollywood. Even with therapists, its so much less than ideal. Imagine having every moment recorded. Every fight, every kiss, every thought shared with millions of strangers. It’s no wonder that many celebrity marriages don’t last. The pressure must be terrible. Every time you go on a date, everyone starts speculating about when you will marry. They know when you spend the night, when you drink too much, when you talk to someone new. Married or not, the baby watch begins, even if perhaps you might be a bit beyond childbearing years. (Invitro! Surrogates! Adoption!) I just don’t see any romance in that. I don’t see how you can build the foundation for something solid when everyone is watching. No, I would rather have a lifetime with someone living quietly in a tiny house with a garden than a few years of turmoil in a mansion with a gardener.
Right!? Living in a fishbowl does NOT sound romantic. I’d still like to have a gardener, though. ;o)
Can’t lie. Me too. But I would settle for in-ground sprinklers… I have to hand water. That means it doesn’t happen. I have the worst lawn on the block.
This makes me so thankful for my loving husband! Yes, we have only been married a short time, but he’s the real deal! I bet Heidi and Seal would be jealous
please let me tell you about the glamorous, elaborate way my loving husband proposed marriage to me 15 years ago…dinning room table, bottle of wine, no ring and..”so, are we going to do it or what?” perfect
LOL! Love that, Liz – and so strange, because I just heard from a woman who lost her husband and she shared that that’s the same way her hubby proposed – “so, should we do this or what?” – and they remained happily married for more than 50 years!
Liv,
I still have this very old LIFE magazine with Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt in a wedding photo. Too funny.
Nice post!
Naomi
Ohhhhh, that’s the one celeb breakup I may never quite recover from! Still smarts a little. ;o)